Ever envisioned your own dodgeball team as characters from Game of Thrones? Tag and share with your teammates if you think a certain character describes them to a tee, valar morgulis!
ARYA STARK – Throws a solo ball and gets a 6 player ricochet hit against the best team in the country. Doesn’t trial for Aus Squad, continues to play rec league.
BRAN STARK – Does nothing all season and wins MVP just cause he rolled his ankle in the final and had a good “story”.
BRIENNE OF TARTH – Beats all the blokes. All the guys want to date her but are emasculated by her dodge intelligence and ability.
BRONN – Super talented player, always gets promised onto an elite squad but ends up getting allocated to mentor a team of noobs and has to hard carry every match.
DAENERYS TARGARYEN – Starts the match saying “let’s just have fun guys, be respectful of our opposition” and ends the match annihilating a newbie team 20 zip with zero chill, screaming at (and subsequently dropping) any teammates who refuse to listen to her calls.
DAVOS SEAWORTH – Doesn’t play often but always shows up the to social events with a beer in hand. Collects dodge jerseys.
EURON GREYJOY – Talks a big game, makes a few bomb catches, ends up getting hit out by an elite player throwing left handed.
JAMIE LANNISTER – Plays left handed because his right rotator cuff is fucked. Says he wants to leave his team every year, always comes crawling back.
JON SNOW – Good enough to make Aus Squad but refuses to trial because he “doesn’t want it”. Always walks off finger blocks cause he’s a man of honour.
JORAH MORMONT – Older than everyone at league but schools everyone without breaking a sweat.
LITTLE FINGER – Elite strategist and shot caller, can’t throw a ball to save his life. Literally. He gets cause out every time.
MISSANDEI – Trains with the squad all year with flying colours only to get cut at the end of season.
NIGHT KING – Elite player who recruits everyone to his team, catches every ball that hits him to constantly revive his dead teammates.
SAMWELL TARLY – Super unfit but doesn’t get subbed cause he’s best mates with the captain. Does stats for his team. Once made a point blank catch against a 120km/h ball but the ref didn’t see it.
SANSA STARK – Had a bad run of playing on inexperienced teams, finally captaining her own squad.
THE HOUND – Only joined your team so he can beat his old team because he’s salty AF. Always suggests KFC for team dinner.
THE MOUNTAIN – Riddled with injury, plays like a beast on court and doesn’t change facial expression after he cops a huge headshot.
THE WHITE WALKERS – Has zero structure or dodgeball intelligence. Throws the last ball, gets out early and waits for their gun catcher to revive them.
TYRION LANNISTER – Has great ideas but can’t physically execute them on court. Says “sorry guys” a lot. Always pays his team rego on time.
VARYS – Finds out all the dodge gossip before anyone else. Knows who’s on elite teams before teams are announced. Finds out the oppositions secret strat.
MELISANDRE – Has a huge amount of ability and talent. Busts it out once in a blue moon. Always overheating.
CERSEI LANNISTER – Subs on the sidelines drinking gatorade while her team dominates week after week. Always plays on a team with a family member.
Who are you?
